Tag Archives: relationships

Panic Attack On Valentine’s Day

Hi everyone! So sorry I didn’t post on Wednesday! We have a lot going on here in our little nest! More on all the exciting things we’re doing in future blog posts…

So, I look forward to Valentine’s day every single year. Every since I was little, I’ve always loved Valentine’s day!

I know what you’re probably thinking, “It’s because you HAVE someone!”

So not true! While I do love to celebrate my relationship with my husband, I also love Valentine’s day for other reasons.

Isn’t it a wonderful thing that we can have a day where we celebrate love? Sure, love should be a part of your daily lives, but I think it’s nice to have a day where we take a step back and acknowledge everything we have.

You could celebrate a relationship with a significant other, your relationship with your parents, your love for your fur-babies, or just that love in general exists. Plus, everything is pink, red, white, and just all around pretty which I love! I’m such a girly girl…

I used to love making my own Valentine’s mailbox at school and getting cards and candy from my classmates. I took picking my own Valentine’s very seriously, and I still do today as an almost 27 year old woman. BECAUSE I’M AN ADULT…THAT’S WHY!

This is beside the point, but it’s something that I always want to say around Valentine’s day when all the haters come out.

I wanted to write this post to share with you what happened to me on Valentine’s day and how our evening ended up in the end.

Like I said, I always look forward to February 14th. So, naturally, I had really been excited since it was coming up!

We took a Valentine’s Day picture before my husband went to work that day.

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Can you tell we’re tired? Flynn is cutting two teeth right now and waking up a lot in the middle of the night.

On Valentine’s Day…you get Valentine’s toast.

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If you’re a fan of The Office, you’ll like my Valentine to Zack…

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So do I, Pam…So do I.

Anyway, the day was going well and I was so excited for going out that night! We were planning on going to the Valentine’s Cabaret that my husband’s students were putting on. However, things didn’t go as planned…

After work that day, I started feeling kind of anxious. I instantly knew that this was going to be bad.

It happened like it always does: heart starts beating faster, cold sweats, feeling nauseous…

And there was nothing I could do to stop it.

I breathed in and out trying to make it go away, but I just couldn’t stop the inevitable.

Panic attacks are horrible and they happen sometimes for no reason. I had friends going to this party and had to text everyone (including our babysitter) that the night was a no-go.

My husband was really understanding and we ended up having a wonderful evening. Actually, everyone was really understanding. I really love that more people are starting to take mental health seriously now.

We watched Gilmore girls, drank some hot chocolate, and got one of our favorite dinners!

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YUM! right?!

Even though I was feeling bad, we ended up having a really nice night as a family.

Zack had a very “dad life” moment at one point. 😛

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We even had some fancy chocolate covered strawberries!

This point of this blog is to remind you that panic attacks don’t have to ruin all the fun. Sometimes they make you change your plans, but don’t let that ruin anything for you. Pick yourself back up and find a way to get through it.

Would I have loved to have done our original plans? Of course! But the important thing is that I can say my Valentine’s Day wasn’t ruined by my panic attack.

You can let them consume you or you can work through them. The choice is yours.

Ellen 🙂

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Our 10 Year (So Far) Love Story

Even from the very beginning, he was a gentleman. He introduced himself to me and we hit it off right away.

A few months earlier, I had seen him in a concert production of Sweeney Todd and developed a HUGE crush on him. I remember thinking, “he’s too attractive to be a nice guy. It would be too good to be true.”

Cut to the day we started dating. He asked me to be his girlfriend in the light booth of our Alma Mater. Then, and i’ll never forget this, he said, “if i lean over and kiss you right now, are you gonna slap me?” I tease him all the time about that. It’s so adorable. That’s one of my favorite memories of Zack. And it’s so true to his character- always wanting what makes other people comfortable and being super considerate.

 

We started dating and it was clear pretty quickly that this thing was going to stick. Here’s Wednesday Adams and Repair Man Man Man at the Halloween improv show!

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I had a lot of fun digging all of these photos up…I think my husband will get a kick out of them too!

I’ll never forget the way I KNEW Zack was the one. It was so simple- we were meant to be together and we didn’t care what anyone else thought. Some people said, “date around before you commit.” We didn’t care, we were in love.

We dated the entire time we were in college and had the time of our lives! Always sticking together through thick and thin. And sweet Zack even let me get a puppy…yeah…I kind of wore him down.

Our sweet Willow:

On the night of my senior show in college (all Theatre majors were required to put on a show as their capstone), he gave me the surprise of my life by popping the question! Of course I said YES!

You can watch the proposal here on Youtube.

He proposed to me in the Theatre I grew up in. All of my siblings went to the same college as I did and I had practically lived there! I counted once, I saw 27 different shows in that Theatre and attended almost every performance. It’s a big part of why I love theatre today, and my husband knew that.

If you can’t hear him, he says,

“Over here is where we met.”

“Up there is where we had our first kiss.”

“But this is the one you’re really going to remember.”

SWOON!!!! ❤ ❤ ❤ Am I right, ladies?!

Our engagement shoot…

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Gosh, I love that man. And that puppy…

Our wedding was beautiful. It was very DIY and EXACTLY what I wanted (thank you to everyone that helped make that a reality!).

It was truly the most perfect day.

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Our college professor performed the ceremony for us. It meant so much since he’s Zack’s mentor.

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Can you guess where we honeymooned? We HAD A BLAST!!!

I have never eaten so much as I did on that trip. I mean, LORD! Those Disney meal plans act like you’re crossing the Desert the way they load you up. NOT MAD ABOUT IT!

My favorite ride is The Haunted Mansion.

Zack’s favorite ride is Space Mountain.

Soon after we got married, we moved to Tallahassee for Zack to attend Grad School for Technical Design for Theatre at FSU. That’s where we met our best friend Rada and got our friendship tattoos.

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We stayed there and had the time of our lives for three years. While we don’t live in the same place anymore, we still talk to Rada all the time! He’s a part of our family!

Once Zack was done with Grad school, he got a job in the North Georgia Mountains as a Professor of Technical Theatre. We love it here. Everything moves a little bit slower and everyone is kind. We’re just not city people and we’re ok with that.

Suddenly, our lives changed. WE GOT PREGNANT!

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Nine months later and our beautiful baby boy, Flynn, entered the world.

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I didn’t think I could love Zack any more, and then I saw him with our son. Zack is an amazing father and husband. He is always working his butt off and continues to be our hero every single day!

Flynn is constantly saying, “DADA!”, and lights up when Zack walks into the room.

It was definitely hard when we were sleep deprived, but we worked as a team and it made us even closer together to learn how to take care of our little one.

Now, we are one small happy family and we feel so grateful and blessed.

It’s an amazing thing to meet your best friend. And when your best friend turns out to be your future husband, that makes it even better!

Zack, I love you. You, Flynn, and Willow are my everything.

I love forward to many more happy days, pasta nights, Flynn laughs, family hikes, Holidays, homes, and years with you. Thank you for everything you do for us. I can sum you up three words….

Awesomesauce

Caring

Badass

AWESOMESAUCE CARING BADASS…NEW BAND NAME I CALL IT!

Ellen 😉